Heya, Monster.

A SoberBlog by a TallWoman.

Drumroll Please….

Happy New Year’s Eve, my friends.* I hope this finds you and yours well and wonderful, happy and blissful, and full of hope and energy for the year to come.

What a beautiful day it has been for me – full of relaxing and cleaning (yes, that is actually a beautiful activity, especially when I avoid it for good stretches of time) and playing and being and eating and laughing and last, but not least, enjoying a beautiful winter’s eve walk in the moonlight. Ahhhh….. C’est parfait. *smile*

And now? I am here to announce my Word o’ the Year. WootWoot. And the word is?

nourish

*lesigh*…. Right? It just feels Good. And I love the definitions because there seem to be so many possibilities for the coming year.

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I see first, my person, and making sure my needs are met on all levels – physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. Lately, I have discovered some addictive habits creeping back in, such as isolating, and eating for pleasure, and rewarding myself constantly (with food). Part of me is okay with the not worrying about calories, however, I have gotten a bit gluttonous. I need to remember to fill myself with necessities and Good Things. Not just stuff to fill me up…. I’m worried there may be a hole or something I am not consciously aware of at the moment, which is causing these behaviors. Not frantically worried, but just noticing at the moment. The past few days have been a bit better since I caught myself, but still. Better to be mindful and considerate of myself, rather than just eating to eat. Delicious, but not necessarily healthy. *smile* Oh, Monster…..

I also like the ripple-effect ‘nourish’ has on my relationships. Deepening them, and embracing them more wholly and again, more consciously feels right and good. After a year of being taken care of, I need to turn around and reciprocate the love and kindness so many people have shown me. It’s my turn, now, to care for them. With two of my dear friends expecting very, very soon, it just makes me excited for the year to come. … And the hubs. I don’t know, things feel more playful and more connected with him again. Maybe it’s because we’ve had some time to spend with one another this past month, but it feels so nice to be his wife. Does that sound dorky? (Yes.) But seriously. He’s just a fun guy, and playful, and nerdy, and handsome. I’m tellin’ ya. I feel lucky and aware of how lucky I am, whereas we are usually too busy to get more than ‘Have a good day’ and ‘G’night’ pecks on the lips most days.

In a wider circle, I love the word ‘nourish’ because of the new school and the new students and the new work relationships I am creating… That I am nurturing. This program my two coworkers and I envision is really, brand new, because we are each brand new. We are beginning this program from the ground, up. Caring and tending and ever so slowly growing it into being. Cultivating. Nourishing! Yes. This word feels especially good and inspiring for the Work. For the Passion. For the thing I would do, even if I wasn’t getting paid (as my dear friend Jack reminds me often). It feels exactly right. And again, because it is in service to this community and, especially, to these children, to these students. Just thinking the word in regards to the work makes my next four months of rehearsals exciting and energized, as opposed to full of dread and obligation. It feels Good. (There’s that stamp of approval again…. GoodGoodGood. I think we have a winner.)

So, yes. Here is to Nourish, and all of its lovely synonyms.

Day 571, Hello, 2017.*

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p.s. A sidenote: I have been on the blogs a lot these past couple of weeks, which has been so wonderful – to connect, to read, to find inspiration. I have noticed so many new people, and I want to say a huge ‘Welcome’ to each of you. The turn of the year seems to encourage many people to consider sobriety, and I just want to say you are not alone, even when you may feel like it, you are not alone. For those of you who have taken your first forays into blogging your own experiences, it’s great to see you and to ‘meet’ you. Don’t be afraid to reach out to anyone else here in this blogolopolis we have going on here. I find so much in your courage to take those first early steps, because it is scary. And unknown. And who knows what will happen? And Even If the worst happens (and it did for me), you can make it. And you can stay present in Your Life. That sobriety you’ve got goin’ on is one helluva beautiful thing. It gives you back your memories, your thoughts, your relationships, your time, your self-worth, your confidence, your joy…. And it removes your guilt and your shame. What a cool equation. Pass me s’more, please. *smile* …. And as I’ve said in the past, I do not have this sober thing figured out. Far from it! I am here, every day, just workin’ on it, even on the shitty days. Because even on the shitty days? Those positives will far outweigh 5 oz. 25 oz. of wine….. Like a herd of elephants versus an ant. Seriously. The scales are definitely tipped in sobriety’s favor for me. And even on those shitty days? (And, dammit, but they do happen.) I am still present. I am still Me. 111% *flex*….. Keep on keepin’ on with your bad selves. *smile* Happy New Year, my friends! Thank you for all you’ve shared with me in 2016. *clink* (It’s bubble water. hee.) -HM.

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16 thoughts on “Drumroll Please….

  1. Happy new year! Nourish is a beautiful choice. Supportive and healthy, without denial.
    Lovely.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Love that! Like a herd of elephants versus an ant, soooo true. Nourish is a great word for the year. Happy New Year!!! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Happy New Year, Heyamonster. Love your blog. Love the idea of “nourish”! Am 50 days sober tomorrow. It’s just BETTER in every way. Red xx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Heya Happy 2017 to you too and loved your p.s. Rock on sober warrior! 😉 xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Carrie Ann on said:

    Happy New Year! Thank you for your encouragement. I truly am grateful you found my blog as I am not exactly “out of the closet” on this sobriety thing.
    I think nourish is a wonderful word! I’m keeping mine basic as this is just my second year with WTY. Last year, “find JOY.” This year, “seek TRUTH.” Blessings!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Happy New Year, HM! Love the word! Nice to hear from you. If you write more this year I promise I will too:)

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Happy New Year!!
    We went walking last night too.
    It’s awesome!
    xo
    Wendy

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Heya, Red.* Sorry this is so belated. How are you doing? Congrats on 50 days! Where are you now? And yes, so much better. In every-every way. -HM.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Beautiful. I’m so glad you’re here, Carrie Ann.* Sorry this is so late in replying. I missed some of these comments this past month. Happy belated New Year. *smile* TRUTH. Yes! -HM.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Thank you, Lucy!

    Like

  11. Heya, Anne.* That’s the goal. hee. Not sure how well I’m doing on it this month, but trying to keep perspective. *smile* How are you? And the beautiful new tattoo – is it inspiring you every day?

    Like

  12. Ha. Well, I was on the posting-train for a bit over the holiday break, but as you can see, I have reached the cliff and the bridge is out. *smile* Doing my best to check-in here and there when I can, but it is sparse ….. And a little drafty. hee. How are you? How was your New Year, lady?

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Me too! I simply cannot be arsed. haha! Shit, I can’t even remember what I did for New Years, um….oh yah, I think fondue and La Croix!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. I’m on 79 days today 🙂 Gonna go read your latest post now! Red xx

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I love the tattoo and it does inspire me!

    Liked by 1 person

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