Heya, Monster.

A SoberBlog by a TallWoman.

Princess Leia’s Sister.

I have always felt alone with my diagnosis of bipolar. I don’t know anyone else who has it and who speaks openly about having it. In my life and in its circles, I feel like an anomaly. Like I have something no one else knows about. Something that makes me different and other and a little separate …..

I’ve also had these feelings about being an alcoholic. (Ugh. That word is so ugly, isn’t it?) Feelings of isolation and difference. I have found myself wondering ‘Why me?’ I get over it and get down to living, but sometimes I catch myself feeling alone.

Growing up, and Now – especially in adulthood – I’ve always had the vibrant Carrie Fisher somewhere in my peripheral vision as someone who gets me. Who knows about Life. Who has lived hard. Loved much. Been loud and outspoken and True to Herself. And I have always admired her for living her life unabashedly. And I find such inspiration in her living her life out loud so that others (me! and people like me!) would know that No. We are Not Alone. Nope. No way. No how. Not a possibility. In fact? There are many, many, many other people like me. Like Us. And all because this Woman, this iconic, emblematic, die-hard feminist Fisher said who she was. What she was. No apologies. No justifications. She laid it all out there. She gave her Truth to us – to me – and her example frees us to be who we are. Empowering. Hopeful. Connected.

Day 568, May the Force Be With You.

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Artwork by Katie Cook

 

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8 thoughts on “Princess Leia’s Sister.

  1. Carrie Ann on said:

    Me too.

    Day 2, May the Force be with You.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Robert Crisp on said:

    I know where you’re coming from. When I learned, years ago, what Carrie Fischer had been through and how she was such an advocate for erasing the stigmas associated with mental illness, I began speaking out more. I’m still not as brave about it as I’d like to be about it (or being a recovering alcoholic) but I’m getting there.

    I grow nervous using the term “mental illness” when it comes to myself, though it applies to me (various diagnoses). I’m active about my treatment: I go to therapy, have a psychiatrist, I’m med compliant. Maybe I just want a better term than “mental illness,” though I don’t react that way to the term when it applies to other people.

    Like

  3. Robert Crisp on said:

    Carrie Fisher, rather, not Fischer. For a moment, that’s how I thought you spelled it and then said, “Wait, that’s not right…” but WordPress doesn’t have an edit function like Facebook. : )

    Like

  4. I was diagnosed with bipolar when I was a teenager. I really know what you mean about being different. Carrie was an inspiration to so many. I think the words we use are so important in the way we think about things. I also hate the word alcoholic. The word implies that the defect lies with the person not the drug. I really prefer to say I used to be addicted to alcohol (long winded I know) I also prefer to use the term mental health issues versus mental illness. I know it might seem insignificant but it matters. I think most people if not all people suffer from mental health issues. It’s part of being human. The fact that it’s so stigmatised is baffling to me. I have yet to meet a perfectly ‘normal’ well-adjusted person with no issues. xxx

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Beautiful. Thank you, Feeling.*

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I completely agree. I use some of the terms because they are quick for others to associate with/to, albeit dredging up negative associations. Argh. I heard a mental health term once, but I can’t track it down right now. Hrm. But yes, with you. Language absolutely matters. …. Glad to know we are not alone.* -HM.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Yes. As I just agreed with HFC above, language absolutely matters. I found when I was labeled As my condition (bi-polar), I found it incredibly difficult to extricate ME from the word/definition. It consumed me for awhile, until I could come to terms with 1. the diagnosis, and 2. that I am not my diagnosis. It is part of me, but that is very different than if I was only it. Weird grammar stuff here, but I think you know what I’m getting at. *smile* -HM.

    Liked by 1 person

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