Heya, Monster.

A SoberBlog by a TallWoman.

The Results Are In.

I am the luckiest woman alive.

I am loved beyond measure.

I am supported.

I am cherished.

I am not alone in my RealWorld to fight/struggle/journey/quest/epic-adventure for sobriety.

… … … … … … … … … … …

Words From My Loved Ones…

‘Oh, M, I am SO proud of you!’ (Very first words my mother spoke.)

‘You are a courageous person. … You get things done. You see something and you go for it. You get the job done.’ (My father.)

‘Wow! …Wow! … You sound Great! You sound ready! …Wow! I just… Wow!’ (My sister on hearing the news, laughing and surprised and admiring.)

‘Is this (i.e. drinking) a problem?’ I say, ‘Yes, I think it is.’ ‘Well, good.’ (Says my very undemonstrative father-in-law …with a smile!)

‘That’s what I love about you, M. You are so passionate. You are completely all or nothing. And you sound so ready for this. I’m happy for you. You sound Good.’ (My best friend with love ringing through every one of her words.)

‘I was wondering, but I didn’t want to say anything. … We were worried about you this past winter.’ (My mother-in-law confides. (I’m so glad they were and that they noticed. I thought no one had.))

… … … … … … … … … … …

And those words are only the tip of the iceberg. Each conversation, Every One, was beautiful and kind and generous and loving. I was an emotional wreck yesterday, not because of the anxiety (that only existed anticipating the calls), but because of the outpouring of Love and the way everyone reached back. So humbled and in awe of my loving people.

And now? I don’t have to hide.

And I have people to call – both my best friend and sister said to call anytime if I find myself in a situation and I feel anxious or upset or tempted or whatever the emotion may be. … I cried when they each said that. My Sister is in Australia and my Best is a crazy-busy-woman with a full time job, a hubs, and a boyo all her own. To know they will pick-up Any Time, if ever I need them to is amazing.

… And my parents were so beautiful. My mom was just – you could hear her smile through the phone line. She said she thought this was a long time coming, and was wondering if I would take this step as we have talked so much off and on about alcohol in the past four years. My dad was surprised, which made me laugh and say, ‘Well, alcoholics are good at hiding it.’ And that made him laugh. He said he had noticed I could hold my wine… And I laughed s’more.

Each conversation was so delicate. Not in a scary, don’t-touch-or-the-glass-will-break-kind of way, but in a newborn-baby-type of way. They were each gentle and kind and so… natural. There were awkward moments and pauses – especially at the beginnings. But really? I feel like I have been given these special snapshots, these dear and once-in-a-lifetime-moments of each of My People that I will get to remember and carry with me for the rest of my life. What Gifts. What Beauty. What Love.*

Day 32, truly Wonder-full.

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19 thoughts on “The Results Are In.

  1. How wonderful indeed 🙂 xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Beautiful. I am happy for you. 🙂
    xx, Feeling

    Liked by 1 person

  3. How beautiful it is to know you have such love and support.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. riding on empty on said:

    What courage to make those calls. I still can’t make those. My folks are judge-y and not warm. When I quit last fall, my father alternated between disappointment that I wouldn’t drink with him and confusion as to how anyone could not have a beer after golf. Mom was confused. Bro is a bar owner, so it’s not in his best financial interest for people to quit. My wife quit for 30 days just to see what it would be like, but she’s a normie and didn’t get it. Maybe I can call your family and friends for support? Seriously, you rock – laying it all out there and being honest with everybody. That’s guts. Lots of guts.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. ROE, You are awesome. Thank you for your encouragement – always. I am sorry to hear your sitch is something other, and I wish you every ounce of strength and courage you need to navigate your relationships. … I will say, though, time and again, I hear that we (I’m putting us in the same boat) have to prioritize our sobriety. It has to come first, even before family/expectations. From people who have done this, it seems to all work out in the end. In these early days, if we’re not always taking care of those around us, but rather taking care of ourselves first, it works out for us (sobriety) and others (we’re better people in their lives in the long-run). Win-Win. p.s. You’re a fucking Gem.*

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Incredibly so.*

    Like

  7. Thank you, Feeling.*

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Yes! Thank you, Lucy.*

    Like

  9. Literally cried happy tears for you, you beautiful woman.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. You made my night. What a beautiful read. Such well deserved love. Sobriety changes everything. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  11. You are wonderful, friend.* Thank you a million times.

    Like

  12. Oh, my goodness. Thank you so much, Christy.* And thank you for finding me. You are so true – it does! It changes Absolutely everything.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. This is just absolutely beautiful, and humbling, and now you have support and a team on your side which is just priceless. If everyone on this journey had the privilege of such relationships and such responses we wouldn’t feel so alone…so happy for you! Xx

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Ok that comment could be read as a little, I don’t know, snippy?! No snappiness meant, honestly – just trying to convey how wonderful it would be if we all had such support…. Hope you get what I’m getting at!

    Like

  15. So true, Prim. I wish I could extend this experience to everyone. So lucky. …Thank you so much.*

    Like

  16. I read this second… And yes. I completely understood. Don’t worry, be happy.*

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Pingback: (Im)perfect. | Heya, Monster.

  18. Pingback: AA …. Okay. | Heya, Monster.

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